Thursday, April 15, 2010

Better Late Than Never.

The inability to acknowledge consequences, establish priorities, have initiative, and overcome adversity just baffles me. On April 16, 2010 at 2 pm, I will start the MATH 1505 calculus exam - an exam that I know I cannot do well in. If I don't achieve a certain grade, I will have failed the course. Never before had this once annual honour roll student and former winner of his elementary school's academic excellence award had to admit his failure of a course. When you leave high school, you are supposed to have a better understanding of who you are, or at the very least know the direction you intend on going. Recent years have culminated into a disturbing downward trend ultimately leading to this point. When one's self is established as being in an esteemed position, the fall from said place is a long way down. Amidst the turmoil, of being a product of one's environment or through self-inflicted wounds, the leader cultivated in grade 11 leadership must shine through. Potential is the dreaded "P" word that is either attained or despised by those unfortunate enough to ponder "What could have been". I am not a nobody. Through re-examining those close to me, undergoing inopportune circumstances, and gaining sociocultural lessons through my first year courses (KINE 1000 & HUMA 2740), I know I want to make a difference. Fear permeates me because of all the uncertainty regarding my present and my future. However, I have gained perspective. Material aspects of life have become irrelevant to my goal; I need the intangible: the ability to proudly state that I will be successful, the willingness to do whatever it takes, and the determination to overcome any socioeconomic or sociocultural barriers in doing so.

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